It should be no secret by now that I am a gamer. I’ll play games on the table, the PC, a console, and on the run with my iPhone or iPad (Think Pokemon Go). Mostly I like PC games. I also happen to like people and I seem to like them better while playing on the PC. It seems the types of games on the PC attract a certain type of player. However, because of my disabilities and challenges I found myself frequently trying to run groups with an eye on helping others, like me, to enjoy gaming without the stress of some of the more militant groups. IE: I run a guild and have for years. I play games to have fun and to take a break from the every day grind and pains of life. Happens to all of us, after all. But, sometimes it feels like the game becomes the job and it loses it’s ability to provide a positive outlet for my recreational time.
One key factor is trying to gather people for set days and times. One would think this would make life easier for all. They would know when to meet up and can plan accordingly. The problem with this is that many people, including myself, have jobs, families, problems, and things that just crop up. Some days…weeks..no months..ok for the past…forever..I feel like this happens to me and others all the time.
The problem isn’t always that things happen. That’s life. The problem is few want to take my place when life comes at me hard and fast. I don’t blame them. It’s a lot of work running a guild. See, there is that word: Work. Most hard working folks with families and health issues don’t have the time, energy, or inclination to take on such a task. I am not bothered by this. Happens to me all to often. What bothers me are the people who give me and other leaders a hard time for having to put “real life first” who either were not willing to help or had not offered to help. They want someone to do all the work and they resent that you are no longer doing that for the moment.
This is where you find out who really is someone that gives a damn about the people they game with. They will stay in touch. Check up. Reconnect when things are smoothing out enough in their lives for them to do so. If you have to take a break and someone bails for another group, unfriends you, and leaves no trace of the fact you had counted them as one among your group…you can pretty much be assured they were only there for what they could gain.
Sadly, they missed out on the biggest gain of all: Lifelong friendship with understanding people that will be there for you when life throws you a curve ball. Because, when I come back..I come back for them and for those that are still there over the years cutting me some slack, happy to hear my voice, catch up on whats been going on, and load up that next game….dude, that’s fun. Not a job.